thoughts on mothers day...

For the past several years, Mother's Day has been a really hard day.  I love celebrating my mom, because she's pretty wonderful, but the ache in my own heart to be a mom has been really rough at times.

A couple years ago, I was visiting my folks for Mother's Day weekend.  At their church, they give out small gifts to all the moms at the service each year, and that year it was a flower of some kind.  As I was leaving the service, my heart was heavy.  I'm not sure what prompted this, but one of my mom's friends handed me her flower on the way out and told me that I had a mother's heart.  I fought back the tears as I kissed her cheek.

My heart is about to burst this year.  Our daughter has our last name.  Our I-600 application has been provisionally approved by US immigration.  We're getting closer, but it still feels so far away (and still could take many months to to get her home).  I'm between super excited and terribly depressed at any given moment. I want my girl.  I want her to have her mama.

These "kids" will have to do for now... :-)

And this mother's day, I'm thankful for an extra measure of grace.  The ache in my heart is somehow less in celebrating this holiday -- our daughter may not be home with us yet, but I really feel like I am her mom.  Praying we're together soon.